Thursday, December 30, 2004

yepp, he's a communist too

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these are great for my portfolio too!

Omg... I don't know this guy.

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BUST3D

WARNING

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Wednesday, December 29, 2004

inside the purple chick magnet

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Yepp thats right you bastards, I was Grimace for a day (last sunday infact!). OMFG it's hot in there! There's this tiny fan in there WHICH DOESN'T WORK! All it does is freaken aggravate you, it's just mounted there...periodically hitting your head, letting you know it's still there...not working... DAMN THAT FAN STRAIGHT TO HELL!! Anyway the heat and discomfert was worth it. Why? HOT CUTE GIRLS CAN'T RESIST YOU! OKok, I'm not that type of guy but after awhile it got fun. NO god damnit I didn't go around grabbing ass or groping, honestly who do you think I am? Andrew? Psssh... So back to what I was saying. All these people wanted to take pictures with Grimace (I'm saying Grimace cuz it feels wierd if I say ME). It felt like I was a star! Actually it also felt like when your four years old, when every bastard out there pinchs your cheek and goes "Awwww cute!" It was great for awhile, crowds of people around you. I had to act all gay cute and shit though. Didn't mind since they don't know who I am, MUAHHAHAHAA. Umm come to think of it, I could think of atleast two people who would love to be in that purple thing. CHRIS LEE AND BILL CHAN!! LOL, jks jks guys don't flame me. Yepp it was all great...

UNTIL KIDS SHOWED UP!! Errrr I had to give hugs, play, be all nice to them. We all know I hate kids. There was this one special bastard who just SAT ON MY LEG THE WHOLE DAMN TIME I WAS THERE!! I didn't realize till I tryed to walk, damnit I couldn't even look at my leg cuz I was so friggin OBESE!! I couldn't see my feet!!!! OH then there was this crazy lady!! She wanted me to CARRY HER BABY!! WTF?! I couldn't even clap my hands how the hell am I suppose to carry a baby?! I'm trying my best to gesture a "NO" but she thinks I'm asking for a hug or something. Plus? What if I dropped her baby, LAW SUIT McDONALDS! esssh. She gave up cuz her son was afraid of me, HE CRIED!! MUUHAHAHHAHHAHA I felt a bit better after that, though that bastard was still sitting on my leg.

After awhile I got used to the little bastards, even that one who was on my leg. I also experienced how it would be to be really fat. How you can't see your feet, or how it's hard for you to fit threw doors. It was funny how I bumped people off their feet though ^__^;; Also funny when I waved at those professional type looking people and they'd get all white and wouldn't know what to do, lol. A struggle taking off the suit, Gord's helped me. Man was I drenched....but it was fun, I'm thankful I got to do that before I left. Going to miss working there. Going to miss the people...the smell, that damn dirty washroom, the tiny mens change room, comlpaining about the huge ladies change room, making fun of everyone, 1yelling "fie-Dee!!" at Shelly, phillip & mai jokes, HAHAHA "MAI-BAD phillip", dirty jokes with mark, cheeko, phillip (cock!), making fun of janny non-stop, throwing ice down peoples shirts, pissing-off the back with my stupid grilling mistakes (like no cheese then adding extra cheese), yelling "GOOD JOB LADIES!" at the back when there are also guys working there (hehe), making sloppy ice-cream cones (MUUHAHHAHA U BASTARDS), "helping" the back, raymond and his advice which he always links to something sexual even if it's something thats unsexual as stacking bags of chicken in the freeezer, my managers and how they're so fun and understanding, the hot-chocolat machine which NEVER fills to the top, that cool water spray thingy which shoots out water at really high perssure COOOOL, the coffee brewing machine (ENDLESS SOURCE FOR ME!), customers from around the world, the french ones asking for beer.... and finally closing which usually means me dancing with the mop. Goodbye


1"Fie-Dee!" means something like "faster!" in cantonese. I usually yell it when she's making the sandwich, then she usually curses at me in cantonese and I'm like "god damnit".


Welcome to America .. Now speak English

Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Can't Believe It

i just cant believe that chris would stoop so low..........i am shocked and appauled at his behaviour.............end this stupid blogwar.........wont you think of the children?

-_-;; OMG Strikes against mylifeasarobot

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Monday, December 27, 2004

Great. Now I need new socks.

My cousin's house has some deadly steps. I managed to step on a random nail, tore a good chunk out of my toe. The deceased sock now has a hole through the edge and a big ass red stain on it. Call it a Christmas sock if you wish, red and white.

This Christmas turned out different. I have had a constant headache for the past month now, some days worse than others. Like something is stabbing me in the back of the head with a dagger. Am I supposed to do be doing something? Associated symptoms are: becoming tired 3 hours after being awake, confusion, and spacing out on the subway ( I even fell over once... but that was because I didn't get sleep for 2 days). Anyone ever have this? Contact me immediately.

Shit. I have to go pick up something I left at my cousins, including my dignity, which I left in neat little red puddles all over their stairs. I shall continue later.

Guest Appearance

making my first guest appearance since i started writing my own blog...i think my new one is going well.....but ive noticed that everybody's got a blog now....like its just kinda like who doesnt have a blog now....**cough**Spenta** cough** those ppl without blogs are such losers...except fatima...she's a loser whether she's got a blog or not (jokes) ......its interesting that so many people are using it...but i like our little online community we've got going on here...we can all share random thought n stuff.....except we need to put a word count restriction on bill......god damn that last post was long...ok im sleepy its freakin 2:40am....y am i still up???

Saturday, December 25, 2004

Good Night..

December 23rd 2004 11:59AM
Listening -
Avril Lavign's Album
BoA's Albums
BeForU's Album

i couldn't sleep last night.. don't know if it is because ive been out the whole day.. or what happened yesterday
anyway.. i decided to record down everything that happened between me and shelley before i forget totally
its weird that there are snowblow trucks (two of them actually) outside right now when my house is in a construction site.. hmm
anyways, here is everything that happened.. according to me at least





today we went to uoft's Froish, or w/e.. basically a playday for ppl who wants to get into engineering
after that we went to mcdonalds to wait for pv to get off work.. who thought that the ut thing was at night, and was disappointed when he heard it was over, since he told shelley that they were going after work
since we were already there, i wanted to stay behind, but durwyn and chris had to get home, chris was pretty pissed when he left
first kent got off work, and ronny came.. she we were just eating up stairs, and finally shelley showed up
this is the first time i saw her in person, but not the first time i met her
we met during the summer during a party at spenta's house. she called me thru pv's cellphone saying hi, and i was like wtf.. lolz
and after that she wanted me to go to pmall wit her cux she needed to do something and pv(who was suppose to go wit her) can't make it cux of work
i couldnt make it either tho cux of fatima's party.. but i kinda missed her party too.. kinda bad
but yes, so we went to the arcade, ronny, kent and pv was so crazy about initial d
at first kent was being mean to shelley, then he went off to play
shelley looked so bored, and when me and pv left she left wit us
she was so depressed, and when i asked her whats wrong she said nothing
i asked pv if shes always like that and pv said this is the first time he saw her like that
the night after shelley added me on msn saying shes sorry that she was like that the day b4.. thatz how we met





i have been webcamming with shelley for a while now
lately i had weird thoughts in my head, because i think i am slowly having a crush on shelley.. thru webcam?
and at the same time i think she likes me too, but hey.. i think this wit almost all the gurls i have a crush on, i mean who doesnt lolz
also, one night she waited for me to go online till 1am when my net was down and i couldn't go on
tonite shelley told me that she would be my gurlfriend, i was so shocked.
at first i thought she was joking because we were actually talking about how i never went out before
but then she said she wasn't just kidding around
i guess this is where a new chapter starts in my life





right after she said she would be my gf, she said she wanted to see me, so i went into dt just for her, and i waited for half an hour at eaton for her
we met, and she ate at mcdonalds.. we chatted a while
when we came out she held my hand, this is.. sadly the first time i held a gurl's hand
we walked all the way back to her house, which i found really neat.. and i felt really good at the time when i was wit her
she bought a coffee just bcux i mentioned that i wanted a coffee when i was waiting for her at eaton centre, and we shared the coffee (altho at somepoint she said she dun really like drinking coffee much)
we walked thru a park near her area (think me pv and jason went thru here b4 when we were walking from jas' to eaton)
i learnt so much about her during this walk. about her ex, her "bf" from china who said he doesn't like her, and many guys she met on QQ that likes her
we walked near her house, and thatz where we parted.. it was infront of a auto shop
she took a few shots wit the cam on her cellphone, and suddenly a guy behind us said "that is a really nice shot".
he was the owner of the auto shop, closing up.. when he said that i felt like me and shelley was from hong kong and came to a country as a vacation.. guess too much tv eh?





Today's date was actually arranged before we even started going out
it is because she wanted a person to be as her "fake" boyfriend, so the guy that likes her would give up
apparently this guy liked her for four years, since when they were both in china.. and they both immigrated at the same time, what luck
since we are now going out, guess no more pretending =)
i waited for her for quiet a while at pape station.. during the time i called chris lee, prasanth, and played lots of mindblaster
the place we went was at dragon centre's echo karaoke... everyone was late so me and shelley was just in the mall chatting
then suddenly this other guy that likes her showed up, what luck
finally kent and ronny showed up, and sooner or later that guy and his friend showed up
at first i didn't really hate him nor like him, he was just neutral
when we went into the karaoke room, he asked everyone for their names
when he got to me, he made the gayest joke of all time

Dood: "whats your name"
Cool: "Bill"
Dood: "Bill? are you serious"
Cool: "Yes"
Dood: "hahahahaHAHA, you must really like money then"
Cool: "uh"
Dood: "Maybe i should change my name to Cash, HahahaHAHAH"
Dood2 "HAHAHA"
Cool: "ha..ha?"

i can't sing.. but good thing shelley is a good singer, so her voice can cover up my bad singing ^^
and that guy.. what a fag.. and right before he left he deleted all the songs i picked.. what a fag
and wtf, he paid for my gf.. when i think i should be paying instead... -____-''
shortly after he left, shelley sat on my laps.. and we chatted
a lil while after her head came closer.. and i knew i should kiss her.. perfect timing.. but i couldn't since i never kissed ne one b4.. so i turned my head and.. laughed. (yes, pathetic)
she prob knew what was going on, a few mins later she kissed me.. and thats how my first kiss happened
for the next few dates (yes, even during my geometery and chemistry test) i couldn't stop thinking about that)
since she said she feel really fortunate when we put our forehead against each other, we did that again.. but this time i broke her glasses ><
blah, why m i so stupid, good thing she had like 5 more pairs at home.. lolz
but if she didn't i wouldve got her new ones.. i mean its horrible if i break them and just be like.. blah
afterwards we were suppose to go out for dinner.. but i couldn't cux my dad called me and yelled at me and told me to go home
i told shelley she could go with Na, Janny, Ronny and Kent, but she said no.. she would leave with me. How sweet.. =)
we kissed/madeout again at the subway station, and the way i go





today we went to the community centre, cux i told her i want to watch her play piano
she kept saying shes not very good, but when we got there she got a whole binder full of music sheets
since the pianos at the ossington community centre was all full, so we sat there and waited
i m still not very comfortable with the whole thing since i ain't used to it, but at one point she came behind me and put her hands around me.. she also gave me this love note in chinese.. but it was written in june lolz
she showed me this love poem she wrong for school, and the guy she drew looked so much like me.. but i think that was drawn b4 she met me as well lolz
finally we got into a room with a vacant piano, and i watched her play piano.. it was fasinating since she told me she learnt these all by herself
she probablly thought i was bored to death, but i wasn't.. i actually enjoyed watching her play
afterwards we went to dragoncentre for fishballs, and then we went to buy sushi
man sushi is expensive, and i felt horrible because she insisted to pay
we ate it on the street car, it was so cute cux she dropped soya sauce, and if it wasnt for me holding a napkin under her mouth it prob wouldve went on her clothes
half way to our stop, we stopped at this store that sells erotic outfits.. and at the front there is two people wearing erotic outfits dancing, shelley was laughing cux she said one of them winked at me
we finally got off at a intersection, and we waited for the bus to come (i thought the bus was to her house, but apparently not)
during the time she taught me how to crush a popcan w/o stomping on them.. that is why i have been doing it at lunch almost everyday.. and stop calling it the "sissy" way
when the bus came, she told me to get on, but she wasnt getting on
i was confused cux i promised her i would walk her home, but apparently her house was right at the intersection
by the time i found out the bus already left, time to wait for the next one =p
i m actually glad that i stayed, because afterwards we kiss/madeout.. and people was staring at us lolz
everytime we kissed, i felt so.. so free, happy.. reliefed.. because altho my school stuff is bugging me so much, i know out of all the crap going on there is still one girl that loves me alot.. and i know that this is the only thing that is good in my life at the moment
when i left i felt so lonely.. o how i wished that shelley lived next door to me.. and went to the same school as me so i can see her night and day.. sigh





today is a date that we've arranged right after our first date, a trip to First Markham Place
i went through so much trouble trying to figure out a way to get there
i found out a bus route.. but it would cost each of us $10 to there and back
so i begged my parents to let me take the car, and they allowed me
since i lived near stc, i parked my car at stc and took the subway to Pape to meet up with shelley
when i was going thru the stc subway i saw shirley, she was going to meet up wit her bf at stc.. how sweet =)
when i met up with shelley at pape, we took the subway back to stc where we walked around for a bit first
i can't believe she thought stc was bigger then eaton centre.. stc is so damn boring and small
by the time we got to FMP it was already 2pm
we spent almost an hour and a half at the sticker picture place.. we spent a total of $40
i paid $20 and she paid $20 (at first i paid $20, then she wanted mroe so she paid $10 more, then she wanted more again and she paid another $10)
it was here where i found out she also love mango juice
i got mango green tea and she got mango crush.. i think, or was it the other way around?
doesn't matter cux we traded time to time
after FMP she said she wanted fishballs at pmall, so to pmall we go
her friend wendy was there, so was my parents =S
we only went for fishballs, and after that we went back to stc (all that hardwork looking for a parking spot for nothing)
when we got back to stc, i used to only changes i have left to buy a green tea icecream for shelley, and we ate it on the way back to ossington
when we were at kennedy, she wanted to drink the melted parts my biting the bottom of the cone off, and let the melted ice cream pour out, but it poured all over her.. haha it was so cute..
and that was basically our date





Today was an early dismissal, and for shelley she didn't even have to go to school cux of parents night (err, lucky)
at first she was suppose to come to my school at 11:30am, but since she got tied up in the morning, we met at stc instead
justin arthur and chris bicos came as well, but we went our seperate ways when we got to stc
i waited at the stc station for her.. when she came down thos stairs it is like in movies when the guy goes to the girl's house waiting for her to come down with a evening grown.. and once she comes down you are just speechless
we took a walk around stc, and finally she agrees that stc is small.. lolz
afterwards she is scared that i might starve to death, so we went to the food court.. and i got Toonie Tuesday (at first i was going to get something else cux eating Tonnie Tuesday is really rough, but she said she don't mind since she don't want to watch the way she eats infront of me in the future, and she eats Toonie Tuesday with her friends all the time any ways)
After my oily cancer lunch we sat around talking, some people from mowat walked by and saw us
Bicos came by and put a rotten sandwich infront of my face, thats when he was about to go home
me and shelley kept sitting for a while, and she gave me a scarf she made, it has a laughing cat on it that looks like me when i laugh.. haha
what a sweet birthday present. she said she was getting tired so i went with her to spadina (since she has to do omething for her mom)
during the way there i kissed her in the subway, but when we parted.. we just waved at each other.. felt awkward





This is the dance that i have been looking forward to for the longest time, and the one that i went through so much trouble for.
why you may ask, well it is because that this is the only dance ive ever went to since grade 8, also i am going with shelley.
also, i havn't seen her for almost half a month
stupid prasanth lost my ticket when he got it, and i was so pissed, but shelley ended up getting another one for me.. but she didn't have to pay again. good thing, i would feel so bad if she did have to pay again
she was so beautiful.. so sweet.. so.. hmm.. awkward
she seems to be really uncomfortable.. dont know why? mb cux this is the first time weve been together infront of her friends? who knows
the bus ride there was so bad.. i wanted to barf the whole way, don't know why.. just felt sick
shelley was so tired that she slept, but instead of sleeping on my shoulders she slept against the window.. hmm..
first it was just sitting around chatting b4 dinner, me and shelley didn't sit together cux i had to go take up another table, and she was sitting with her other friends on the other table..
rite b4 dinner it was a price give away, there was dvd player, mp3, and a phone.. but the ticket i had dind't even have numbers, and shelley didn't win ne thing either.. she seemed sad about it.. but what can i do?
after dinner was the dance, which is the most awkward position ive ever been in
i feel like that guy in the story we had to read in our english class, where he brings the girl to the dance club when he knows he can't dance. and he ended up having a horrible date
that is basically what happened to me, i can't dance. we spent the first 15 mins just standing there, i asked her if she wanted to try dancing with me but she said no...
i felt so stressed that i went to the washroom the wash my face.. when i come back i see her having so much fun with her friends, that kinda tells ya somethin eh?
so the whole time i tried as hard to let her b alone so she could have fun, since everytime i m wit her again she seemed to uncomfortable
pv tried to help, kinda make things even more weird.. and i kinda feel weird when she is more friendly / close wit other ppl then me, but o well
when we sat at the table it was better.. not much but a lil
she was much more talkitive, and we had fun. but it made me feel weird when i saw her friend and her friend's bf doing everything me and shelley used to do when we first started dating.. like kisses and cuddle etc.
i kept thinking.. what is wrong with us.. why are we so awkward with each other.. and quiet, and etc.
the whole thing ended at 11:45pm, and we got back to eaton at around 12:15am. she seemed so tired/sad when we got off, pv jen and the couple went into eaton while shelley just walked off to the street car stop, so i followed her.
she seemed egered to leave, cux she kept asking if there is a street car yet, like she wants to get away asap..
and when she went in the street car.. she didn't even look back (which.. she usually do)
there is something wrong..





Happy Birthday to me.. this is probablly the worst birthday anyone could ever get
instead of spending time with my friends at jack astors this year, i decided to spend my time with shelley.. the girl who is slowly drifting away from me
it was the most awkward date we've probablly ever had. prob cux we didn't even hold hands.. ha.. meh
a few days before she told me "on ur birthday i have to tell you two words" and it seemed to me it was happy birthday.. but i think it couldve been applied to something else.. "break up"
most of the time we were just walking around.. while she was looking for a usb key and asking fido how to put pix onto her cell. pmall is so boring
went to market village, she saw her dad.. not her real dad, but u no wut i mean
it was somewhere here that she started telling me her story.. which basically leads to us breaking up
when i was driving her to the stc RT station, i told her to open up a box.. when she took it out it was a big heart-shaped jar filled with starts (half way filled at least)..
it was very depressing at that very moment because what she just told me, and i felt bad at the same time since i put her in a really awkward position...
well i guess all i have left to say is happy birthday bill.. hope u have a happy birthday with the news you just received.
this is almost like saying happy birthday to someone who's family is all dead
you know it is impossible for them to have a happy birthday...





Shelley have been ignoring some of my phonecalls lately, don't know if it is coincidence or not
today i went to eaton centre with Fatima, Andrew, Lindsy, Courtney, Jennifer and Spenta. Candice and Prasanth was suppose to come, but coincidently, both of them couldn't make it (the only two people i told my problems to)
the whole time i can't really keep my mind from thinking about shelley, and what is going on between us
i really want to tell her something, but it is impossible when she ignored all my phonecalls today
I saw emily and connie as well at eaton, and everytime i see her i just tell her how stressed i am..
i also so erica, but i just say "erica you suck", and she would just punch me and we walk away lolz
when fatima and courtney got in an argument i wasnt even in the mood to give inputs since my own problem was bugging the crap out of me. After we skate i was to tired, and my legs were hurting. At the same time i had a stomach ache all day and a headache as well. I don't know why, but i decided to wait for shelley to get off work even though i was in such a bad mood i should really go home. i would probably fuck things up even if i get a chance to talk to her
i got there at 9:50pm, and waited till 10:55pm for her to get off work
when she did get off work, she was on her cellphone when it was pretty obvious that i had to talk to her. maybe waiting one hour for her to get off work isn't obvious enough. Kent came over and talked to me.. but shelley just used this time to walk away
since i was in a really bad mood and wasn't up for bs. also i no telling her what i wanted to tell/ask her wouldn't help much, so i decided to just leave and forget about it
Kent just flipped out on me saying "telling her later won't be the same as telling her right now!! Don't go or you'll regret" etc. etc. etc., but meh... like shelley once said to me "sometime you don't have to say it out loud as long as you know that the person knows it inside"
just my luck, when i was at the lowest point of my life, there is a naked drunk bum sleeping face up at the southbound queen's subway entrance.. i was so pissed off that i was going to kick his balls off
but a) i rather not look at it for too long b) i was desperate to leave the place
this is the end of the story.. and end of the memories..
maybe we will stay friends, maybe not.. i guess only time would tell



writing this whole thing started out really depressing.. since i started out with the recent stuff. but as i go back to the stuff in the pass, i figured that i had a really nice time. like my friend said to me "ignored the sad parts and remember the happy times" so i m glad i recorded this down, so i can read this whenever i want, and remember the happy times i had with shelley
In a way i want to thank her since i have never been so close with a girl before..
leaving for new york tomorrow.. (saturday), hope that will help me get my mind of this..
listening to BoA/Avirl Lavigne's albums while writing this isn't a very smart idea..
merry "death-wish" christmas
good bye. 5-2-0-1-3-1-4

Friday, December 24, 2004

hahahahahaaha im so smart!

I just remembered something. I was just sitting here and it popped in my head! My annoying little cousin! The one who bit me. Anyway one day she wanted to play a game. She kept yelling. So I told her to go hide and that I'd find her. Well of course you know how it goes, I left to my other aunts' house. >=D

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

you must know

chris | watching some movie says:
i have a confession to make
playground love says:
im straight
playground love says:
and u better be too
chris | watching some movie says:
no im serious man
chris | watching some movie says:
its happend the last few years
playground love says:
SO SHE WAS A SHEMALE
chris | watching some movie says:
no i was thinking
chris | watching some movie says:
i should tell u guys
playground love says:
u have aids
chris | watching some movie says:
I
playground love says:
AM?
chris | watching some movie says:
I STOLE CHRISTMAS
chris | watching some movie says:
AND ILL DO IT AGAIN
playground love says:
OMFG
chris | watching some movie says:
LOL
playground love says:
LMFAO
playground love says:
omg that was good
chris | watching some movie says:
i planned that one out as i was taking a piss

>=D

Hey Drew I made you a link :D
LOok! -->

Declaration of cold blogwar.

This is an official declaration of cold blogwar against: "mylifeasarobot.blogspot.com." As you said Drew, "and no blog-wars Beans or I'll have to turn everyone you know against you" Keyword: Beans. I am not Beans, so I guess its acceptable if I cast the first stone, and have PV and everyone else follow. :D

Enjoy the shrapnel of words and images to come!


Oh and Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.


(HAHA I watched 20 episodes of Chobits in a row. Thats roughly 7 hours. I love holidays ^_^)


Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.us
Scary Man I Saw
Lee fucked around with this blog at 01:05 am.

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Breaking Away

I've decided that I'm going to be breaking away from this blog a bit to do my own....dont worry i'll still make a few guest appearances on here but you can check out my good stuff at http://mylifeasarobot.blogspot.com
Hope you enjoy it

(and no blog-wars Beans or I'll have to turn everyone you know against you)

Monday, December 20, 2004

Odd Feelings...

its bin a very odd atmosphere fo me da past few days. im not gonna go into details, buh its jus my mind has bin wandering in circles tryin to find the answer to a question. its not that i already dunno the answer, i think i do, i jus da answer is in sort of a blur to me. neways like i said its bin an odd atmosphere buh one thing dat has kept me going is my music. fo example rite now while bloggin dis, im listenin to sum hindi remixes and its got a crazy beat. and its jus got me all pumped and excitied god noes fo wha reason tho. buh thn there are times whn i listen to the saddest type of music and i jus feel so alone, so lost. and its a sudden change. one min im jus all happy and the next i wanna curl up on my bed and jus let my thoughts take me over. buh its after that time u've wasted wallowing away on ur bed that u realize uve bin wasting ur time and lyfe away. time dat u cant get back. even whn knowing this, y is it dat we styll do dat? is it a way fo us to grieve, or take a step back and reflect on past events? buh are there other ways of doing dat w/o havin to feel so much pain? Or is it dat we let our mind wander to an extent dat we mix reality wid our imagination...?

Sunday, December 19, 2004

happy birthday bill

happy birthday bill!!

i can't find bill's cell phone number, only his house number, but then he moved, so..........

heh heh

Saturday, December 18, 2004

some birds

when I was really depressed, i used to listen to this one song all the time. i could listen to it tirelessly. i would listen to it as i waited for the bus in the morning, as i ate lunch, as i walked with friends, and especially loved listening to it as i lay to sleep. it's funny though. i have no clue what they're saying in the damn song, i can only clear out some words. when i first started listening to it, i didn't even think it was fully english. i thought it was like a mix of english....with some language familiar to english, but not. i still think that. at least i can be 100% sure he says "some birds" in there. i don't know who sings it, thought it was coldplay, but it's not. i googled it, no meaningful information. i don't know why i like it, or listen to it. i've listened to it so much, i should have gotten tired of it long time ago, like i have already done with so many songs. i guess it's because i don't understand it. what if it's not even english? maybe just me listening to it so many times, trying so god damn hard to relate the words to english.... that i've somehow blurred the distinction between something that’s real and something that i want so bad to be, and ended up with sounds that my brain interrupts as "english words". i don't know if you lost me there, but i'm sure you've all done it too, im just a bad writer. sometimes, i wish, actually most of the time, that i could listen to it as if it's my first time. with a clear mind, one without any type of...i don't know the word, "triggers"? or "experience", basically i want my brain to not try to match it up with things it as already learned from it from experience, but embrace the glory of mystery, the feeling you can only feel when it's the first time. i guess that is impossible, since as soon as i realize i don't understand it, i'd start trying too. when i do find the truth, it would only open the doors and lead the way on to dissatisfaction and the final end, when i just stop listening to it because i've listened to it over and over again. what the hell? that isn't fair, i finally know what it means. does that mean i should search endlessly for the truth, the meaning, but simotaneously hoping, wishing, that i would never find it? is that what forever means? is that what love is?

Thursday, December 16, 2004

A Series of Random Events

so me and fatima were taking the bus home and candice was with us. She stayed on the bus tho wen we got to the go train station and for some insane reason we decided to leave it to fate as to whether we would go to stc or just go home. If the 85 came i would leave fatima and we would both just go home.....but if the 38 came first we would go to stc. as it would happen the 38 came first and we went shopping...we were supposed to be doing christmas shopping for my sis & mom but that quickly turned into a day of random events. so we hit up guess for some reason.....n fatima only made me try on the gayest shirt she could find!!!!!! then she finally went and got some good shirts that were actually nice......except they were like friggin $100 each!!!!!!! wtf does guess think....im made of the green stuff?! i think those sales ppl thought we were going out too =S and they were telling us the exact amount of time the store would be open until christmas! wtf! "Only 71 more hours of shopping time" they're weird!....after that we got stocking stuffers at wal-mart for my sis and i ended up buying fatima that dumbass cosmo magazine...i think the cashier girl thought we were crazy! and then randomly fatima n me go to shoppers to get me a maxim mag.....=D!!!! that was funny.....even the cashier held it face down!!!!!!!!LOL!!! so fatima's mom picked us up....i swear she thinks something's going on....if only she knew she's a few months late!LOL!
I still didnt get anything for my mom....mel i think we're going half-sies!!! =D

i can't dance

Whoa, just got home from the party. I'm losing my voice, err. I'll write more tmr, after I get pictures from Ball Chan and Ronny. Now I must go make a god damn flyer, and sleep! Wow, it's 2 am and my parents don't even look annoyed. T__T; Far from the days when I'd get yelled at for coming home late on halloween night.

Eugh...

I HATE THE FLU.

Update later. Now Sleep.





Tuesday, December 14, 2004

A message to Ronny

First, congrads on the new iBook. I hear your having problems with MSN and the "white hard drive". Everytime you download something ending in .dmg means it will extract to a virtual hard drive. As you know these disapear after each reboot. To keep MSN messenger, drag it from that virtual hard drive into your "Applacation" folder. Then drag the empty VHD into the trash and "eject". MSN is not that good for the Mac. I suggest that you try AdiumX. Its more like MSN for the PC with display pics etc plus some really cool skins and plugins. Oh and you might want to try Konfabulator aswell.

wallet full of memories...wheres the money?

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I looked at my wallet today. I haven't cleaned it out since...I can't even remember the last time. Found so much trash in there, like old old bank slips and paper hearts from TTC transfers. Then again, I found priceless things like my Rs.50 rupee bill, which is my only remaining bill from my Sri Lanka vacation. T___T; I spent the cooler looking Rs. 20 bill on some Fanta. My S.I.N. card still has those stickers my little cousin put on it. Everytime I see it, it reminds me of two things. One, when I asked her what she wanted. She kept saying she wanted nothing, but finally after I kept bugging her, she said she wanted stickers! ...And that is what she'll get, lots and lots of damn stickers. SO much that she'll regret saying stickers. >=( The second thing I don't remember who the lady was, I think she was the lady taking my I.D when I went to get my G2 license. I gave her my S.I.N. card and she flips out and tells me there shouldn't be anything on my card and freaking starts ripping out the stickers. I got pissed and told her to stop. LOL, most awkward moment. Well, I understand the "no sticker" policy, but that doesn't give her the right to rip off whats mine, even if it's just a few dumb stickers. Umm, I think it's missing two stickers now. Just three left. Wow, I never knew stickers can be so depressing. Theres something else in my wallet thats almost as depressing. It's a reseat for a flower I bought long long time ago. I know whats my problem. I can't let go of things. I'm too god damn attached to things, from something as small as grains of rice to something as big as life. No, I don't carry around the grains of rice in my wallet. For your information I keep it in a little cup Chirs Lee got me from Universal Studios... next to the wet naps I received on my flight back to Canada (Exp.: 02-2006). Good'on-ya! Chris, as aids-face would say. I guess I should start throwing things out. For now, lets just say my wallet doesn't make as much a big bulge on my ass has it did yesterday. =D

Monday, December 13, 2004

Happy Holidays from Lee.

The following Blog may not make sense as I wrote it hastily.

Recap of Monday - Friday
Junior Concert - Good
Senior Concert - Great
Moshow - Great
Having reserved Yearbook seats - Priceless

Haha. Saturday, my deep course, we got bored and we all left half an hour early, said we had some business to take care of. Doesnt matter, supply teacher anyways, some professor from McMaster. Gave one of the most boring presentations ive ever seen on Thermosomething. Almost everyone fell asleep, except me cuz i didnt want to be rude. The last part was interesting tho. Then we sat and whipped paper at eachother, and left to go bother the civil engineering people. Haha. Then we left the campus, and it was friggin snowing, and the subway station smelt like shit. Everyone goes a different way than me, so I was all alone :( I missed my stop twice, but got some nice pictures. :D

Ah yes. I got my new debit card. Still cant find my old one, when I talked to the bank, they said someone tried to use my card last week. I don't remember if it was me, but theres nothing missing so its all good. New bank book as well. Locked that one up in the safe, its not disappearing on me again.


Thus ends the serious part of my blog.

Yes its Christmas again. A time for joy, a time for cheer. One of my favorite times of the year, cuz we get 2 weeks of school off ^_^. Brings back fond memories. That Christmas special that gave me batshit insane nightmares is on again. The one with the elf who wants to be a dentist, and Rudolph, the red nosed reject. Yeah, that one. That abominable snowman haunted my dreams when I was like 5 years old. I swore revenge, and here 11 yea... sorry 12 years later, nothing. Oh wait... Yes I remember now, i burried that fucking tape in my backyard.

Hallucinogenic Monstrosity of a Christmas Special - 0
Lee - 1

I was at the Eaton Center for a couple of hours on saturday after deep. Packed like... the comparason i would make here would be extremely awkward so lets move on. Had to get a few things done. The game my brother wanted was sold out, so I have to travel to the depths of futureshop to purchase it now. Or Best Buy. Yeah, Best Buy is better. I got a coffee which burned my fingers cuz the cup is as thin as a condom, thanks McDonalds.

Ah yes, I was taking a few pictures of the decorations hanging from the ceiling of the mall, when I come across, guess who folks! Old man Santa Claus. With his big red grease stained suit, and his jolly bulbous folds of fat hanging out, sitting with little children inside a giant fake castle with the little anorexic elves taking photos. (BTW: I have no problem with kids liking Santa Claus, this one at the Eaton Center just disgusted me.) What a pedophile. For chrissakes, the mall security is watching Santa caress the little children as they cry and try to get the fuck away from him, as the mother smiles with that stupid little grin on her face. And santa is enjoying it. You can tell by his red rosy cheeks and his unbuckeled belt as black as coal. And let me tell you, that is NOT snow you see all over his trousers, no matter how white it looks. Whats more? Theres a sign inviting children to bring their pets too for a threesome of holiday cheer. So now hes a Greasy 50 Year-old bulbous beastiallic (is that a word?) pedophile that women pay to rape their children.
And Christmas is a time for giving too. Sad. If I had a kid, and that diseased piece of stillborn shit thing tried to touch my daughter, I would do something not nice. I swear, that thing is from Oshawa.

Then I go to Blacks to get a sample photo developed. They didnt say It was gonna take 1.5 hours for digital. Bastards. So I got bored. Took some pictures of people for fun. Almost got caught. They all came out blurry anyways so damnit. I would say something about the girls at the mall but then you'll think im a pervert.

Im getting bored of writing this damn thing. You can fill in the blanks and guess what happens next.

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Oh and by the way, YOU ALL FAILED MY CONTEST. NO WINNER.

PICS:

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Thanks ImageShack!
Stay in school.

Sunday, December 12, 2004

merry christmas

National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane, with all the other rich people, and I want him brought right here with a big ribbon on his head. And, I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no good, rotten, floor-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed, sack of monkey sh** he is! Hallelujah! Holly Sh**! Where's the Tylenol?

brothers from other mothers

After work I went 1 level down and sat in front of Banana Rep, my usual waiting area in Eaton Center. Why? Such a nice seat under a live tree, not that plastic crap you see everywhere these days. Anyway I was waiting for my brothers from other mothers to show up. SO, I'm sitting there minding my own business, sipping my water, and suddenly, outta no where this little bastard rugrat shows up at my feet. He just stands there infront of me, looking moronoly?...then smiles. I tried ignoring him, but then he tried to grab my shoe. Err, little kids. I felt sorry for him though. He looked like he was wearing six layers of clothing PLUS a giant puffy winter jacket, which made him almost completly immobile. He looked like a puffed-up starfish. Then I noticed his parents sitting on the next seat; they were having a wonderful time watching me trying to ignore him. Finally he decided to go block people trying to walk by with his cutness.

About time, they finally came. They went with Janny to celebrate her coming soon B-day. We walked to the tea shop, stopping to take pictures and stopping to notice strip club posters. We had some good conversations. Like that party on wen, where I'm going to be avioding a certain someone becuase I'm wearing a white shirt. Oh yeah, the guys washroom was locked with a paper posted on the door which read "Sorry, Out of order. Please use ladies washroom ---> ^^;", this was my FINAL break, I FINALLY HAVE A VALID REASON TO ENTER THE LADIES WASHROOM! Wow, it sure was cleaner. I didn't find a couch though. They had expensive soap! >=(

We all left and walked to Timmies, to blocks north. Saw Janny's twin. Bought my large coffee >:D. On our way to main street we talked about this nice area where I want a house. I'll go take pictures of that place one day. On the subway was funny debating over if Jason's new hair color is either PINK or Purple. I say...pickish purple? Well, we all agreed on one thing though. That the girl in that ad was REALLY HOT! Gotta get a pic of that too. K, I better start my hwk now.


Saturday, December 11, 2004

Re: Why am i still up?



What Neon Genesis Evangelion character are you?


i got this first and thought it was more bill than me...so i retook the test and got this:



What Neon Genesis Evangelion character are you?


This is a little better but not exactly me...

why am I still up?



What Neon Genesis Evangelion character are you?


Tuesday, December 07, 2004

Tomorrow

What will tomorrow hold in store?
Will it be fame and riches?
Or pain and suffering?
True love's embrace?
Or a lonely face in the mirror?
How can I tell you?
What if the words never come?
What if tomorrow you're not there?
How will you know?
What if tomorrow everything goes wrong?
What if tomorrow I'm not the same as today?
What if tomorrow never comes?

Deathwish

I am going to microwave a bag of popcorn with the 'This Side Up' side on the bottom.

Sunday, December 05, 2004

Quotes from A Beautiful Mind.

#1 Nash : I don't exactly know what I am required to say in order for you to have intercourse with me. But could we assume that I said all that. I mean essentially we are talking about fluid exchange right? So could we go just straight to the sex.

#2 Nash : I find you very attractive. Your assertiveness tells me that you feel the same way about me. But ritual remains that we must do a series of platonic actions before we can have intercourse. But all I really want to do is have sex with you as soon as possible.

I like #2, it's sweet.

Friday, December 03, 2004

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GOD DAMNIT!! SOMEONE FOERGOT TO PUSH THE STUPID THING DOWN AFTER THEY SHOWERED!! AND NOW IM ALL FUCKIGN WET FROM TYRING TO WASH MY LEGS IN THE DOG DAMN TUB!!! #t&*$&!!

movie review?

I watched A Beautiful Mind today. Wow, it was moving. I don't know what else to say about the movie, then just..it was AMAZING. Oh yeah, and it's got like the best pick-up lines in it. You have to see it, I can't remember it off my head. I borrowed it of Shan when I went to his house to fix is STD infested computer. I don't really mean it has STD's but just that it's infested with like what, 500+ spyware and about 365 (last count before I left) viruses. LIKE WHOA?! THATS ALOT OF PORN SITES HE'S BEEN ON. I also borrwed Memento, I donno whats that about. Russell Crowe is a good actor eh? From like all the movies I've seen him in, they've all been good. Then again I haven't seen many with him in it. Anyone seen Proof of Life, that's a good movie aswell. Um, what else to type about. I finnally got that Kick-Off Assembly thing over with. >__<, what a relief.

This post feels weird when I don't talk
about anything perverted eh? Therefore...

OMFG Jennifer Connelly is so HOT. She looks so beautiful in all the dresses she wears in the movie. Especially the one she wears to the picnic, so cute. Cute butt too, what? Great scene, that scene with the construction workers. Speaking of butts, Ronny wants to go clubbing just because Rudong told him girls rub their butts on guys crotch's when they're "dancing". I think I'll go JUST to prove how stupid and wrong he truly is. Oh and one last thing. What is so god damn embarrsing about telling a guy your waist size ladies?!! DO YOU WANT US TO GUESS?! Cuz' it'll either be aggravatingly too large, or, pervertly too tight. >=D

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

heres how I think the game should be Drew

Ok Drew I know your making that zombie game and I'm going to give you some ideas, to make it a hit!

#1 Give all the lady heros big boobies

#2 Gravity does exist you a-hole, so make sure you show that
#3 There should be hot girl zombies, with like ripped clothing...I mean..they are zombies!
#4 Make a very provocative game cover, if you have trouble with that just go look at the lastest issue of Cosmopolitan
#5 Do not call me beans, call me Captain P.
#6 I should be like Charlie in Charlie's Angels.
#7 Make Bill a zombie, a retarded one that is like walking into a wall

OKay, I better get back to math now. I'll tell you more in person, till then.

Note to "masta drew"

Your god damn post is huge! I know your not used to huge things, but you didn't have to go all crazy! Well thats about it. Oh and two other things.

Alot of females I know have been complaining about it being so "hard" for them to dress-up (formal). But of course, they want too, the love it, it's just so god damn "hard". Also aparently it's so very "easy" for us guys too. Umm... Well maybe so, but hey, we don't force you to dress up! Infact, most of the time we're trying to get you to undress? So if you ladies are thinking about going topless, YOU'VE GOT MY SUPPORT! I sware I am not a pervert. SERIOUSLY.

Second thing, hahaha this one funny. There was this short bus driver, and he sat on a huge paper pile over his seat so he can drive. I thought that was funny.