First period went by pretty fast, due to it being shortened because the weather was too hot (seriously). I even wore my long sleeved professional looking white shirt on this hot day for the giant super-fabulous Student Job Fair. Durywn also was dressed professionally, but Chris was not. That dumb bastard, so we walked under the scorching sun to his place so he can get changed. I played with Sir Douche Bag while Chris got changed, then we printed out our résumés and headed out for another long walk to Rouge Station to catch the 85.
I swear to god, I'm three shades darker now, BUTT, it's OKAY, cuz this Job Fair will be awsome and I will hopefully get a job and be set for the summer. I went into the public washroom in the station, OMG SOMEONE REALLY LET ONE GO. Anyway, back on topic, the 85 came by shortly.
Nelson house, Nelson house, it should look like some big recreational building. That's the type of building we were looking for out the bus window. Still no sight of the building, I was hoping they would have a giant inflated King Kong in front of the building, with "STUDENT JOB FAIR" written across it's chest, nope, monkey in sight.
I was getting a bit worried, the bus seemed to be heading into some residentional area, what if we missed the building somehow? The bus stopped at a regular bus stop, I noticed some house with balloons on it, also some cheesy bristal board on a table, with people sitting behind it. Chris noticed it too; we got out of our seats to take a better look. It sure seemed like some sort of "fair", the bus was getting ready to leave. We all rushed to exit the bus; I think we all sorta hoped we would get off at the wrong stop. We got off and saw a sign on the lawn of the house; it read "Nelson House". Durwyn told me later at that point he had said "What the fu*k?". We were standing in front of some really old historic building, which for some reason had an army jeep parked on the lawn. This was retarded; we didn't expect Nelson House to be ... literally a friggin house! Did I mention it was small? We decided to walk in.
The people there looked friendly, or maybe they were just happy to see people show up. Once I stepped in to the house I felt a bit happier, it was air conditioned. It was kinda crampy, but that was alright since it was practically empty. Me, Chris and Dragon Slayer were kind of speechless. We all knew what the other was thinking; it was one of those awkward situations. We walked into the other room, sorta like zombies. I saw more cheesy bristle boards, a fat laptop and a guy in an army uniform. I knew it! It's a trap! They're going to make us enroll. Okay, they didn't, but the guilt was there.
We went to the other room, this one was smaller. It had three tables. One was empty with a stack of resumes on the side, the other had some round blue things on it, and the last one had a guy with a mustache in front of it. It was a fire fighter one. We said hi to the fire fighter man, he was nice. Then the lady with the blue things on her desk started telling us about her table and what it was about. In short, it was about MazeMaster. The guy who was the pimp of the empty table came by and talked to us. He reminded me of that guy stuck in the pyramid scheme in Garden State (great movie). He accepted my résumés; Chris and D-cup had to be 18. Chris got mad and punched him in the cunt, he fell the the floor in shrieking. At this point we decided to walk out side and check out that table out front.
I wanted to drive that army jeep. It looked realllllly slow and rugged, just the way I like my jeeps? I wonder if it had been to War World II, that would be cool. Ohhh, I wonder if it had run any Nazis over? Cooooool. Anyway, Dynomite said it was a bad idea and proceeded to table further away. There were three girls behind it. A white, black, and brown one. Sorry Chris, no asian. Well technically, the brown one could be from India, which is apart of Asia, oh nvm. The white one talked with us, and told us about job openings in various places. Japan Camera, some retail, some other retail, and the Bingo hall on Lawrence. I applied for everything but the Bingo hall. Thats the last place I want to work, Andrew already thinks I'm hitting on his grandma, IM BEING A GENTALMEN DAMNIT! She also offered to critique our résumés. Durwyn was last to get his analyzed. She read about how Dynomite is going to take Engineering at UofT next year, she mentioned she was in year two engineering at Queens. I swear I saw a flare light up in Durwyn's eyes. Then she said she was impressed how he started his own company and how his little D3 Computing logos were cute. I think our little Dream Crusher was in love, I could hear Coldplay's Stars coming out of him (look at the staarrsss, look how they shinneee forr youuuuu... etc). Naturally I just sorta walked away to the other table to give them some privacy. About five minutes later Durwyn got back to us, we decided to blow that popsicle stand. Durwineous looked a bit gloomy, actually we all did. Well I think Durwyn's was because he was leaving his Queen's Engineering Princess behind, poor D-rag. Love and heartbreak in ten minutes, that's hardcore, only someone has mentally powerful as Dragon Slayer could handle that.
I waved taa-taa to the jeep. Chris told Durwyn to be strong and not look back. With that, we climbed aboard the chopper and flew away in to the distant sunset, while the M*A*S*H theme echoed out of Durwyn Disappointment D'Silva's belly.
1 comment:
THOSE BASTARDS!! I KNEW THEY WERE TRYING TO INROLL US!!
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